I'm a Ballerina at the NYC Ballet — and I’m Losing My Hearing

Sara Mearns, principal dancer at New York City Ballet, has shaped her entire life around ballet, arriving in New York at 12 years old and committing hours each day to a dream that demanded everything: “That was it. That was the goal. To be on stage.” Known as an intensely musical dancer, Sara reflects on career-defining moments like performing Sugar Plum Fairy in George Balanchine's ‘The Nutcracker’ and the quiet fear that set in when she realized she was starting to lose something essential. Mearns was diagnosed with nerve hearing loss after noticing subtle but frightening changes. “I realized I couldn’t hear anybody,” she says, describing the moment she began missing the live orchestra and relying on visual cues from her partners.

At the height of her career, Sara found herself struggling in silence — drained from the constant effort of trying to hear, missing jokes and conversations, and sinking into isolation. “I was at the top of my game but I was walking to work crying every day,” she recalls. After finally asking for help, she was diagnosed with nerve hearing loss, a turning point that led to hearing aids and, as she puts it, a world reopening. “I started tearing up on stage, because I finally heard every single instrument and the power of it.” By sharing her story publicly, Sara has connected with countless others facing similar challenges, reminding them, and herself, that even when it feels impossible, there is light at the end of the tunnel.

With special thanks to choreographer Jodi Melnick and Dr. Marta Gielarowiec, AuD, of Audio Help Hearing Centers.

COMPANY People
DIRECTOR Jordan Fein
PRODUCTION COMPANY Log and Hatchet
DIRECTOR OF PHOTOGRAPHY David Russo
CAMERA OPERATOR Spencer Thielmann